not doing to good

i have not been doing to good. i have been trying to let god speak to me and hear what he wants me to do. i just dont know what to do. i stay sad 99% of the time i hide it from everyone but my hubby has started to notice. any little thing about someone being pregnant, or just hearing about thing to do with babies makes me sad.... also all i want to do is go look at baby stuff. what is wrong with me lord please tell me i need you now more than i have ever. but where are you. if i were to ask someone they would say he is right with you and just feel him there..... but i dont what is wrong with me. please lord help me please please please. please tell me what i need to change to be able to achieve my dreams. this is my prayer i pray to you lord please help me.